December 2009
29 posts
“‘Because even if it breaks your heart to be just friends, if you really...”
– Scrubs
“‘When you miss me just look up to the night sky and remember, I’m...”
– Jayde
2009
2009 is about to draw to a close.
As per pre New Year tradition, many of us sit and think of resolutions we would like to achieve in this new year, full of abundant opportunities. Others say thanks for the wonderful times that they’ve had in 2009 and look towards a brighter future.
I suppose that I’m no exception. For the past few days, I’m thinking of some things I wish...
fuck every mean people out there
latestkiss:
“‘You have your looks, you’re healthy, have a couple of bucks in the...”
– Dorothy Vornak, Golden Girls, Season One, Episode 9 (Blanche and the Younger Man)
AGE
A: Age is just a state of mind.
B: Tell that to my thighs!
LADY GAGA
Q : how do you wake up lady gaga?
A : poke-her face.
i laughed, okay.
Mom, Dad, please stop fighting.
It hurts.
“‘You know a society isn’t having enough sex when you see people...”
A: Thank god my date is tomorrow, the fat (from this meal) won't have time to show.
B: It won't?
A: No. It takes a few days before it starts to show.
B: Where does it go in the meantime?
A: To Connecticut! How do I know where it goes to?
C: For me, I balloon up almost immediately. I can go out to dinner and in the middle of a meal, my pants are cutting off my circulation so bad that my feet start turning blue!
MUSINGS
Shea butter reminds me of baking cookies (it smells of VANILLA SUGAR!) that I won’t be surprised if I accidentally tasted it once. Or bit my hand off..
If it had a voice, it’d be hurling curses at me.
“‘True friendship is like sound health, the value of which is not known...”
“‘As I grow, I evolve.’ - Azri Miskal, BITCHFIX”
“‘The money I spent on tuition, she spent on a tummy tuck and a butt lift....”
SUBTLE INFERENCING
A: Wherever she goes, she always finds a man!
B: So do hookers!
“People can forgive what you did to them. But they won’t forget how you...”
“The value of a timeless gift lies in the thought put into it. What really...”
“‘No one can make you feel inferior without your consent’ - Eleanor...”
FESTIVITIES
Somehow, it doesn’t feel so festive in Singapore. Blame it on the lack of seasons, or perhaps, the fact that I’ve got a hangover from the multiple sugar rush I’ve had in the last 24 hours.
Since everyone is out and about with their loved ones, and I still feel reluctant to leave the comfort of my new bed, I shall post my Christmas wishes here instead.
Bitch Gang. I’m...
MERRY CHRISTMAS
While Santa’s busy stuffing his fat ass through that abysmally narrow chimney, I’m sitting on a comfortable couch, eating cinnamon rolls and watching the latest chick flicks. Who needs a fictitious character when you’ve got real presents just waiting to be unwrapped?
Speaking of cinnamon rolls, I just spent my day baking. When you’re as slender as I am, you don’t...